This is Stephan’s podcast appearance about God Is Not a Belief, It’s an Experience on the Podcast Junkies.

Podcast Junkies episode 104. This week, we speak to Stephan Spencer. More on that in a minute, but last week, did you catch that conversation with Desmond Adams? How interesting was he? He's so humble and so sincere that I connected with him immediately. I can't believe that he was putting off coming on the show. I've asked him a couple of times, and we were supposed to get it set up, and we have a mutual friend, Jeff Brown.

And I'm just happy that it happened, and I'm happy we got to talk, and I'm happy I get to have conversations with my friends who are fellow bloggers. Good thing I didn't say forever, blogger fellow. Nevermind. So, uh, we connect the podcast movement as I often do with my friends, and it just gives me more conversations to have on the air with people that I enjoy speaking to. So check that out. 103.

Stephan is also in that same circle. We actually were in a mastermind group, Taki Moore's Black Belt, and he's doing a lot of good things. I'm actually holding his book in my hand, and it's heavy. It's called The Art of SEO, Mastering Search Engine Optimization. He is the man when it comes to SEO. He speaks frequently at conferences about the topic. But that's not the only thing he does. He was the founder of Net Concepts. He's a three-time author with the book I just mentioned and a couple of others. He's the inventor of Gravity Stream.

Automated pay-for-performance search SEO platform. And he's blogging all the time. So, do you think that a lot of those things would be what we covered in this episode? And it's not the case. We talk about the investment that he made in himself to change his life. About the time that he spent with Tony Robbins and the Tony Robbins group.

But how he met the love of his life through these conferences and how he's really just dramatically changed his life. It's crazy. Like when you hear a story about who he was and who he is now, it is night and day, folks. Night and day. And it was just fascinating because, as we are apt to do here, we go off on tangents.

And we get deep into what makes people tick. And I'll tell you right now, Stephan is an incredibly interesting guy. And I'm happy we had this conversation. So, without further ado, check out my conversation with Stephan and stay tuned for the retention hashtag for frequent listeners of the show. If you're new to the show, that's where we engage with our listeners and our family and find out if they're really paying attention because I give them a hashtag that's only available at the end of the show. And we've got a new sponsor as well, PodFunnel. We'll talk about that, but let's have a chat with Stephan. So welcome to Podcast Junkies.

Well, thanks for having me.

We just started.

Okay, well.

We just start talking.

Surprise.

Yeah, I mean, sometimes we do a formal entry, or I just ask you how your day's going.

It's gone fantastic. I told you already I just landed a new client. So I'm flying high.

So, we were just talking about the podcast movement, and I was wondering if you could just repeat why, what was so important or what you noticed differently about the podcast movement that you haven't seen or that your wife hasn't seen in other conferences that you've been to.

Yeah, so it just was a really genuine community. It's not that people are not genuine at other conferences, but they're making podcasts and doing their art because they're passionate about it. And it's their kind of mission not to make a big pile of money. Cause most people are not making money podcasting. It's kind of a cost center. I mean, it's a cost center for me. I even had one of my assistants add up all of the expenses. Holy cow. Like $4,400 a month. For three podcast shows, two of mine and my fiancee, Orion, has her podcast as well. So three podcasts, we're doing show notes, transcripts, we're doing PDF, like nicely formatted versions of the transcripts with stock photos and everything and episode art pulling quotes from the from the transcript and using those in in the episode art and everything the social media all that $4,400 a month.

So well, but you know, back to your question of what was special about the podcast movement, it is just a magical community of people. It's just really, really great. Orionfor, for one, was just so relieved to be in a community of people who are interested in making a difference in the world and not just having really slick marketing because we go to a lot of conferences, and they're great information, and it's all about the money. Show me the money.

How many do you go to a year?

Probably 40 or 50.

Wow.

Yeah. I speak at a bunch, and we're in a number of masterminds. I also go to a lot of seminars. Yeah, it's a lot. It's a lot, a lot. I mean, I kind of am a junkie for learning.

Conference junkie.

Conference junkie, seminar junkie, personal development junkie. Yeah.

But that, it speaks a little bit to sort of from the conversations we've had in the past about the story of how you've changed your life. I think you're a big proponent of learning what it is you don't know in order to make yourself a better person.

Yeah, absolutely. I mean, I've had such a huge transformation happen. I showed you what I used to look like back before I went through my transformation. The before and after is pretty shocking, right? So that was a big kick in the butt to go to the Tony Robbins event and do the fire walk and realize if I can walk on fire on 2,000-degree hot coals, I can certainly go and get LASIK. Now, I was a big wimp about that until I went and walked on fire. Then I made all these other changes, and I became literally unrecognizable from the guy I was.

And that spilled over into my business and my, you know, my finances and everything, my whole life was rebooted, just because I went to a Tony Robbins event, and I decided to take action from that. And I wanna share that with the world. That's why I have my Get Yourself Optimized podcast, where I can share some of the wisdom that I got from all these other gurus and experts in areas like biohacking and mindsets, sex even. We've had sexologists who have just been mind-blowingly amazing.

Like Jaiya, that was a great episode of my podcast. Oh my God. Yeah, so I want to share this with the world, and that's where this podcast came in. Then, I decided that I was in the space of marketing. I am known as an SEO expert, and I need to have a podcast on marketing, too, because that's kind of my thing. That's my bread and butter. So, now I have two podcasts, and there are a lot of balls to juggle. I also got my consulting clients, who I'm working on. It's a lot, but I love it. And I wouldn't do it any other way. I would never give up these podcast shows.

I mean, I'm even thinking, maybe I should have another one where I'm just doing an Ask Pat sort of show where it's just me instead of having guests. I love having guests. I've had amazing guests. Byron Katie, Dave Asprey and Jay Abraham. But how about just me? Like I'll be the star of the show, and then there's another show that I have to manage. And Orion's like, "Are you crazy? You can barely manage two shows and then all your clients and all the travel we do. That's just nuts."

But you're not alone. I mean, all podcasters think the minute they've got their one show under some sort of system or schedule, then immediately their thoughts are like, well, I could, you know, because we always feel like as podcasters, once we've been given the platform, we always think that there's another topic that we can talk about and educate people on.

Yeah. And there's another, there's another format we could do. Oh, we should do a Q&A type of show, or maybe it should just be me and a cohost just riffing back and forth every week. It's like. No, like shiny object syndrome. Let's just let it go. Just get solid and consistent and really on a roll with your two shows, and you're good.

So, as you've started to grow the optimized geek, have you? I know in the beginning you mentioned that you wanted to have people there who helped and were important for you and your transformation. And as the show has matured, have you been looking, um, are you still connecting with people that were helpful for you or now that has, has that now broadened to people that inspire you in a different, in a different way?

Yeah, it's broadened. It includes people that I have just met. For example, I heard them speak at a conference, and they're amazing. And I'm like, ah, this is a topic that would really resonate with my listeners and help them. Yeah. Let's get them on.

So it just depends on, as far as topics are concerned, as long as it's in the wheelhouse of life transformation, it could be career, peer group, partner intimacy, sex, or anything like biohacking. I interviewed Dr. Daniel Kraft this morning, who's kind of a big deal because he heads up the whole medical side of Singularity University. Yeah, so that was a killer episode.

So how do you, so, you know, we all have this idea in our head of what a really good episode sounds like, or, you know, we know that when we finish an interview, we're like, there's something about it that everything was firing on all cylinders. So what are some of the criteria that you have so that when you finish an interview, you feel like, wow, like that checked off all the boxes?

It's an interesting question. I guess what I like to see in an episode is all of the kind of wisdom and experience kind of shining through, whether we can cover everything in an hour and these are long episodes. I usually do our long episodes, so that's a lot of stuff, but they could go on for hours and hours because their subject matter experts like Dr. Daniel Kraft could go on and teach a seven-day Workshop and still not be finished. I mean, it's just mind-blowing, so I'm trying to get a lot of value conveyed and have some actionable insights that people take, not just entertainment, and there are plenty of podcasts that entertain. I want people to like to get off their butts and do something with the information. And if all they do is passively listen, I fail them.

How are you measuring the extent to which the listeners are taking action?

Well, that's hard. I mean, it's tough to have these kinds of metrics. I mean, we don't even know our subscriber numbers, right? It's kind of ridiculous. Someday, I imagine we'll get that kind of data, hopefully, but in the meantime, we just kind of make do and provide as much value as we can. So, I go out of my way to provide things that distill insights into the episode. So it's not just show notes. I have my team create a checklist for each episode, a checklist of action steps to take based on the interview. So I don't know of a lot of shows that do that.

I don't think so. I can't think of many that do. And so, does that tailor the types of questions you ask the guests? Cause you have the checklist in mind.

Nope, not at all. You know, I don't even have prepared questions. I mean, I'll have general topics. So with Dr. Kraft, I knew that we would talk about just diagnostics, different tools, apps, where things are heading, therapies, 3D printing of organs, all that sort of stuff. But I didn't know which specific tools we would go into. I didn't know what sort of directions we'd go with, you know, it's kind of the path that will illuminate itself as you go down it. So there are plenty of shows where you just have a set of seven questions, and that's just what you do. And I'm the antithesis of that. I believe in winging it.

Well, I mean. To your credit, it's a controlled winging based on you having selected the right guest because you know your audience, you're picking someone who you have an interest in speaking to, and you're engaged in the topic. And so all those things together, there's some organization there that allows you to have these in-depth hour-long conversations that at the end of the day do end up providing value for your listeners.

Yeah, yeah. So I know, I just kind of get in the zone. It's almost like a flow state. You can tell when I'm not in a flow state and I'm doing the interview versus in the flow state. They're just much better episodes. Hopefully most of the episodes are in the flow state. I think I do a pretty good job of that.

So you've had some pretty big names on there. You just mentioned Dave Aspey, and you've had Tim Ferriss on as well. Were any of those, or is there someone else that I haven't mentioned that was a bit of an intimidation factor in terms of the name?

I've never been intimidated by a guest, by their stature, my recognition or anything. I've had a lot of bestselling authors on. So between the two shows, let's see, Phil Town, he has two number one New York Times bestselling books. He's kind of a big deal. Dave Asprey is a big deal.

Harville Hendrix, I guess Byron Katie would have been the one I was most struck by because I've been a huge fan of hers for a long time. But you know what? One thing I do that I think is kind of unusual is not just me extracting brilliance from the guest. I actually open myself up, and I become vulnerable in the conversation.

I did an interview last week with Mark Dahmer, and I let him use me as a guinea pig. He has this process. So, he does hypnotherapy and stuff. He has this process of having you go through these five areas of life and score yourself on a one to 10 scale. And he had me do it live on the show. And I'm like, yeah, I'm game. Okay. So, and then there was this one area that, the area of accomplishment. I'm like, yeah, you know what? I'm not hitting all cylinders there. I just don't, like, and in fact, I had another guest on a couple of weeks ago, and we talked about imposter syndrome, and I think I have that. I even wrote a Huffington Post article about it afterward.

I was so impacted by that conversation, and the adjunct of this comparative success syndrome is kind of an adjunct to imposter syndrome, where you compare yourself to what you could have been. Right, so if I had stayed on track of getting a PhD in biochemistry, I could have cured cancer or whatever, and I just went after the money instead, so I have to deal with that. Right, so I'm like, boy, I don't really. These things don't come to the surface normally, but when I am open and vulnerable on a podcast episode with a world expert in an area like Byron Katie has eliminated suffering essentially for millions of people, literally millions of people, with her process she calls the work. And she did it on me on the episode. I was open to saying, well, here's an area that is uncomfortable for me.

Let's talk about my middle daughter, who doesn't speak to me currently and hasn't for a number of months that still brings me a lot of pain, and let's use the work on that, and she's like, great, let's do it, and I did and on on the episode, and I think it really adds so much more value. It's not just instructive, but it's real, and then people can relate, and they can work to use that in their own lives. They can see, like, okay, this isn't just textbook stuff. It sounds good in theory, but no, this is actually "Stephan's a real person, and he's got real problems like I do. And he works through them using some of these tools that these guests have, uh, have created."

When did you realize that that approach was something that was going to have more impact on the listeners? are afraid to go down that path, and they want to present the best possible face on the show, and as the host of the show, they want to have this image of themselves as, for lack of a better term, being in control. But was that something that you had in mind from the beginning, or was that something through as you started doing more episodes, you realized that could have more of an impact?

It was definitely through the process of doing the episodes. It wasn't specifically from an episode that I got this insight. It was from taking Kabbalah classes. Yeah, so Orion, my fiance, is Israeli and Jewish. As a way to connect with her in a deeper way to understand her culture and her religion, I started looking into Judaism classes. I decided that the kind of Orthodox or conservative Judaism didn't really resonate with me as much as Kabbalah did.

I didn't know a lot about it, but I'm a big self-help junkie, right? So it's very self-help. And oh my goodness, I just really resonated with it. I could just touch me, touch my soul. So we have gone through Kabbalah one, Kabbalah two, and Kabbalah three, each of your 10-week classes. And now we're going back to Kabbalah once again because there's still more value to be gotten from the earlier content. It was all my idea, first of all, for us to go to Kabbalah classes and then for us to repeat the whole series again.

That was all my idea, and one of the things that specifically relates to podcasting and being vulnerable and using this as a platform, not to just show off my ego, but as a way to really genuinely help people in a vulnerable sort of way was the content in Kabbalah related to your ego. So I don't know if you've heard that Madonna is a big into Kabbalah, and Guy Ritchie as well. He created a movie called Revolver, which is kind of a cult classic, and it's based on a lot of Kabbalah terms and Kabbalah principles, including the death of the ego.

Like when you are out there in the world doing good without concern for your ego. So much more light is revealed from your vessel, right? It's just, it's incredible. And so kind of, and this is tough for me because I'm a guy who has written three books and who speaks at a lot of conferences and writes a lot of articles and clearly is kind of significance driven if I'm doing all that, right? My ego is a bit of a big deal, right? So, doing this vulnerability thing was a little bit of a stretch for me, but it felt so much more like I was in my soul.

That's a good place to be.

Oh, I love it. I love it. And I've just changed a lot of stuff about how I interact with people, how I run my day. Like, I start with a prayer in the morning and at night before I go to bed. And I was agnostic most of my life. So big, big difference. Now I had this big kind of spiritual awakening in India in 2012 that helped me to kind of get connected with the fabric of the universe and creation. But before that, pretty much my whole life, I was agnostic, so a little different.

Yeah, there's probably only a handful of folks who were studying biochemistry that ended up reading the teachings of the Kabbalah, I would imagine.

I don't know about that. I think you'd be surprised. There was a saying.

Yeah, nowadays, I think it's fair game. What's fascinating is I had an interview earlier today and we were discussing Fibonacci Spirals. It's an interesting day when you go jump from Fibonacci spirals to the Tree of Life. I think I'm huge into all of this stuff, and I've worked with plant medicines. I have a deep, deep connection to the spirit and the universe. So, none of this surprises me because I think it's like a vortex that you generate. And when you run in that space, you just end up having conversations like this and connecting with people who are of the same mind. And I think people that are around you can see that, you know, there's something changing within you in terms of the way you perceive life and how you perceive others.

Yeah. And these things are not mutually exclusive. They actually are very much synergistic with each other, the science and the spirituality. I just went to Dr. Daniel Amen to get my brain scan just because I heard him speak at a Brendon Burchard High-Performance Academy seminar, you know, yet another seminar. And what an amazing presentation. He is just so brilliant. I don't know if you know who he is. He wrote Change Your Brain, Change Your Life, which is a big, best-selling book. So I'm gonna have him on my podcast, of course.

I'll be interviewing him in a couple of weeks. But what an incredible set of insights that when you get your brain scan, you can see, all right, so here is what's happening inside my head. And here are my behaviors. Like if, I don't know, not if I'm stuck in a certain pattern or whatever, and it can show up in your brain scan, in the blood flow. Did you know that there's a part of your brain called the God Box. And when they stimulate that, like put electrodes, like if they have your skull open or whatever, and they stimulate that part of the brain, you'll have spiritual awakening type experiences?

Really?

Yeah, so there's a part of your brain that is wired for my spiritual awakening essentially.

And I imagine it has a different when that part is, I think you said activated or touched it. Depending on the person, they could have different experiences.

Yep. I don't, I don't really have a lot of data around this. I've just, I remember hearing about it and I was very intrigued, but, yeah, it just shows that there's this connection between science and spirit. We are wired to be spiritual beings. So it's a lot of fun to kind of go down this path and go down the rabbit hole.

Are you surprised to the extent with which you've become more and more interested in this topic, the more you learn about it?

Not really. I guess I just get more. I don't know what the word is, but I feel like I know myself better. It's like I'm shedding the layers in Kabbalah that these are called Klipot, the shelves that stop the light from being revealed. So I'm kind of peeling these away as I, and surprisingly, as I'm doing more podcast episodes, who would have thought? Yeah. So, it's a spiritual experience for me to do these podcast episodes. I mean, some of them are just like, Oh, that was, that was good content. But some of them are like, "Wow," that I revealed some light in that episode.

I bet you didn't think when you were starting the podcast that this is a direction you would be taking.

Oh, no, I just thought, you know, this is, uh, this is good. Good for my brand and good for getting content out there. It's just a great opportunity. But now I'm like, yeah, this is part of my soul calling.

That's pretty exciting when that happens, though, isn't it?

Oh yeah. And like there's a whole new pathway that has revealed itself. Like I'm gonna, I'm working on a self-help book. And then, in fact, the Get Yourself Optimized podcast came about because I wanted to do a self-help book. And I have a ghostwriter who is helping me with the book, who's gotten some other bestsellers, who's, you know, helped with some best sellers. And I did not want to just hand him over all these subject matter experts to interview. That was the original plan. And then I'm thinking, you know, that's a terrible waste to have all these great episodes, or not episodes, just interviews that are purely used in a printed book and then the audio is thrown away.

And it's just my ghostwriter having the conversation. What? What, you know, that's a travesty, you know? So let's get me on the interview; let's record it and use it not just for the book but use it for a podcast episode. That's how Get Yourself Optimized started. And then I realized, you know what, I really need to do the Marketing Speak podcast, too, because that's my bread and butter. Now, two shows, both weekly, both an hour piece. Yeah, it's a lot of work.

But I imagine the way that they're progressing and that the way that they're growing and the, and the just the conversations you have with these guests that continue to impress and inspire you make you feel that it's worth it and that you're, you are continuing to add value. Otherwise, you wouldn't continue.

Oh, absolutely. Yeah. I'm in my gift. Yeah. I want to shed the stuff that's not my gift. You know, the three D's: delegate, delete, defer. And then the stuff that is in my gift, I want to do more of. And doing the podcast is my gift. Doing the audio editing is not my gift. Creating the show notes, not in my gift. Transcript, not in my gift. Episode art, social media, you know, the posts for Facebook and Twitter and all that. Not, and I guess that's a skill I have. Not in my gift, though. That is not what I'm here on this planet for.

Herding cats.

It's funny. I'm glad this is an audio-only episode because, you know, my cat's been just basically laying on my keyboard the whole time. I'm worried that she's going to disconnect the Skype connection. So it really wants my attention.

She wants to be on the podcast.

Yeah.

So, when you went through that period where you had this transformation, and you went to the Tony Robbins event, who from your family was the most surprised that like what they were seeing in terms of what was happening to you?

Oh, they were all surprised. Yeah. I mean, it was a particularly dark time in my life when I was really unhappy. I was going through a divorce, and I was just socially awkward, and I didn't have a date for the first two and a half years after separating from my wife at the time. So I needed something to give me not just the skills but just a whole mindset shift reboot, right? And that's where Tony Robbins came in. But also, I learned some stuff from Neil Strauss, Brendon Burchard, and a bunch of other folks. It was primarily Tony. I even basically followed him around the world for three years. I signed up for his Platinum Partnership, which is a big expense. And then we went to India. We went to Cabo, Whistler, Fiji, South Africa, Botswana, Zambia, and all over.

So, what was happening to you mentally or spiritually as you were doing this? Because I think it's, I get the impression that you're like an all-or-nothing type of guy. Like when you find something, and you feel like this is what works, you're going to do the, you know, the top-level version of it because, you know, I imagine the message is resonating with you very strongly.

Yeah, yeah, so I go all in if I really like it. And I think it's valuable. I'll go all in. So it was tough when I did this Tony Robbins thing for three years. You have to put your business on hold to some degree because you're following Tony all over the world. And a good half your month each month is traveling to a Tony event or a Platinum Trip or something. So yeah, it definitely took its toll on my business in some ways because I had to get back and implement all the stuff I'd learned. But the connections I made and the peer group I have now are out of this world. I mean, some of my best friends are Platinum Partners. I'm not in it anymore, I haven't been since 2013, but these are lifelong friends. And people who aren't just successful but who are really driven to contribute and grow.

When did this desire to be someone who can contribute to society become something that was important to you?

It's 2010, I guess. I sold my company, my agency, which was called Net Concepts, in early 2010. And so I had the financial means to do the stuff like the Platinum Partnership, which is like six figures a year, and I wanted to make a difference. I realized that I had resources now, but I didn't really have them. I mean, I know I had many constraints. Let's put it that way because I was.

In my company, I did not have a majority stake after the divorce. So, I wasn't in control of the company. I had a board. I was one of five seats on the board. So, just being rid of that and having the complete freedom to just go off and follow Tony around and go to other seminars and all that as well. I just had this strong focus on contributing and growing. And like in 2012, I think it was, I had donated a school to be built in Zambia. I joined Impact Network as a board member. And it all came about because of an event I was at. I was in a mastermind and one of the guys I met there, Dan Cetera.

Really cool guy, one of the founders of Yext. He had founded a non-profit. They were building schools in Zambia and operating them and had a curriculum that they had created and everything. I'm like, "Wow, that's amazing." I wanted to build an orphanage, and I couldn't figure out how to get past all the hurdles, the bribing of the government officials and all that sort of nonsense. So I'm like, "Oh, I really should just like go with somebody that has already figured that stuff out." So yeah, donated, it's only like 25 grand to have a whole school built and operated for a year. That's less than the price of a car. So, if you're thinking of upgrading your car, why don't you build a school instead?

It might have a bigger impact. Is this aspect of you, this generosity, this giving nature, is this something that you felt has been in use since you were small, you were a child?

Yeah, yeah. Certainly, in all my adult life. I don't know if I recognized it as a child, but the whole time I had been running Netconcepts, I'd been focused on donating some of my and my staff's time towards non-profits. So we had helped the Carter Center, for example. Yeah, the Carter Center does amazing things all over the world, like essentially eradicating Guinea worm disease in Africa and stuff. So, this president, Jimmy Carter, has had such an impact on the world since his presidency. So, I had listened to an interview of him on Sky Radio. I'm like, "Wow, what an amazing man." And I just essentially cold-called them and said I'd love to help out. Nice. That was well over a decade ago, like 2002 or 2003, something like that. I did that with the Foresight Institute and just read a book called Nano by Ed Regis about nanotechnology.

In the book, they talked about Foresight Institute and what they're doing to help with public policy and so forth with nanotechnology. I'm like, wow, what a great organization. So I cold-called them, spoke to the executive director and said, I just want to help you guys out, no charge. We built them a new website and did SEO for them, search engine optimization for those of you who don't know what SEO is, and helped them get higher rankings in Google. Did all that for free, and we did a little bit of work later on on a paid basis, but the vast majority of the work that I had done over the court, all of it for years, had been pro bono until, you know, they got a grant money and they said, Oh, we should, you know, actually hire you and pay you something. So yeah, that's kind of in my DNA, I guess, wired that way.

And you got to meet Jimmy Carter.

You know, and I didn't, I didn't, but what I, my claim to fame there is that I got President Carter to blog. He was the first president or ex-president, you know, to blog. And my idea was, Hey, you're already doing trip reports in these different countries that you're visiting. And these were the early days, right? So, very few people were blogging back then. Why don't you call these trip reports blog posts? Now, you're a blogger because they were essentially blog posts. And so they did it. They started, you know, a blog and started posting on his trips what he was doing, the people he was meeting, the projects they were working on, and everything. And he was blogging, and the media went crazy like, "Oh my God, even presidents are blogging now." They said they wrote me this really nice testimonial. "This was the best marketing initiative or online marketing initiative we've ever done, and it's all thanks to Stephan." I got the testimony on my website to prove it.

That's a nice testimonial.

Yeah, yeah, pretty cool. But I didn't go into it thinking, that's what I'm after, right? So there's another Kabbalistic idea of sharing. You can either do it proactively or reactively. Proactive sharing is where you don't have any agenda. You're not trying to get something out of it. Like even if you give a bum on the street $5 and you're waiting for their reaction, that is reactive sharing that is not proactive.

So if you want a blessing, if you want to light from this, if you want a blessing, it just has to be no strings attached. And if the guy spits in your face, it's totally fine. You know, you are spreading light in the world. And yeah, so that's what I did, is I just went and offered my services. I didn't have expectations of getting any kind of reward out of it.

Now, there were cases where I did do some reactive sharing, like donating, donating, end quotes, and an SEO audit to Target in exchange for a testimonial. So, having the Target brand on my website as a client was pretty amazing back then. So, that was reactive sharing.

From a business perspective, sometimes, you know, you want to do things that are going to help your business grow. But I think from a personal perspective, the proactive sharing is just more in line with, like you said, like the teachings that you've been learning. And I think you just feel it. Like when you give without expecting anything in return, the nature it colors the nature of your giving.

Yeah. Yep. I agree.

Can you talk a little bit about the awakening that you had in India in 2012?

I was sure. So, this is what happened: I was on a Tony Robbins platinum trip, and we got oneness blessings from oneness monks. Oneness it's non-denominational. It started in India, but it's kind of like the sugar that you can add to your tea or you can add to your coffee. It works if you're a Christian or you're Muslim, you're Hindu, Buddhist, whatever. And these oneness monks were giving us dikshas, which are blessings. They put their hands on your forehead or like on your head and pass divine grace into you. And I'm like, okay, yep, sounds good.

I'll take that.

Yeah, I'm game, sure. And I was agnostic, so I'm like, okay, that's fine. That's not that I disbelieve; it's just I'm not skeptical. And I had an awakening. Everything, like it touched the God box. I mean, it just, it was incredible. Everything was surreal. It was like I was viewing everything in Technicolor. The color of the grass had never been so green in my whole life, like cartoon-type green. It was amazing; everything was glowing and beautiful, and I felt this immense amount of love pouring over me, coming out of me and going inside. I was in a different world.

It was amazing. They say that the monks say that God is not a belief but an experience. That makes sense, right? I mean, I got that kind of intellectually when they said it, but then when I got that one, I had gotten Diksha blessings before at other Tony events cause he's big into oneness, and he at each Date with Destiny, he'll have a oneness blessing, uh, thing on one of the evenings. I don't know if you saw the new documentary. We were just talking about it in the other interview.

From what I heard, it just came out a few days ago.

Yeah, it just came out. Yeah, I'm not your guru. So it's all about the Date with Destiny experience, which is where I met Orion. It was an incredible event. So I met the love of my life at Date with Destiny.

That just sounds too perfect.

It does, doesn't it? Well, you know how life happens for you, not to you. Tony Robbins says this, and I believe it. I had this amazing experience in India, and then I was just in the vortex. I was receiving so many blessings, and all these miracles started happening, and I knew that I could start asking for miracles. So, the day that I met Orion. That morning, I was working on my poster board for Date with Destiny. You probably see in the movie that people are doing their posters and figuring out their mission statement, power virtues, relationship vision and all that. 

So, I was writing up my relationship vision, and as I did that, I was praying. I connected to the Divine, and I'm praying for her to show up. Right away, and I'm specific. I remember specifically asking, well, you know, you get what you asked for. And if you just say, well, someday I would love for, you know, the love of my life to show up. Well, if you ask for it right away, you get it right away. If you just can't leave it open-ended, well, who knows? So, I specifically asked for it right away. And then 18 hours later, or no 12 hours later, we were introduced by a mutual friend.

And the event had just finished. It was all over with, and it was in the lobby of the hotel. And my friend calls me over and says, introduces the two of us. And an hour later, we are just like, a friend of ours, a friend of mine, now a friend of ours, took a photo from above. And it looked like we had been together for a decade or something. And we had only met an hour earlier. 18 hours later, we said, I love you to each other. Nine days later, I proposed to her in a hot air balloon in Vegas, where she was a captive audience.

That's probably the best place to propose like, well, you know, anywhere else to go. So, you know, make sure you answer this in a way that's best for both of us.

Well, you know, the irony of all that is she said no. She said, "I'm not ready."

That's so funny.

Yeah, because, and boy, that was the most awkward 20 minutes of all time waiting for that darn balloon to land, but it made sense because I had thrown all logic out the window. I'm like, this is my soulmate. I had actually done a Diksha. I was a blessing giver. I had learned how to do that in India. And so I'd given her a blessing because no one had touched her head during that evening at Date with Destiny. And so the mutual friend who introduced us, he had given Diksha to her, and I had offered to give Diksha to her, like, I don't know, 15 minutes after we met or whatever. What you do is connect to your divine and pray for the person. The more that you pray for them, the more that you want the divine grace for that person.

The more blessings, the more grace flows through you into that person. So I was praying for her as if she was my soulmate, and I knew. So when I said I love you 18 hours after we met, and I proposed to her nine days later and all that, I knew because 10 minutes, 15 minutes, whatever it was, after we met, I connected, and I prayed for her as like, "Oh wow, she's the one." And now we're finally getting married. Like nine months later, I reproposed and then she said yes. And now we're going to get married in Costa Rica and the Osa peninsula.

Very nice. Congratulations.

Thank you.

Can you tell me a little bit about what that feels like? And when you originally were introduced to her, and I'm interested in, in that very rapid timeline, but I'm also interested in what is going through you in terms of like an affirmation that like a real or a realization of something you requested earlier in the day manifesting itself in physical forms, like right in front of your eyes.

Okay. So, I guess what's your question here?

What is going through your mind at that point in time?

You know, I don't think that there's anything specific. It's just, you know, there's this idea of being in a flow state, and you're plugged in. I think that I've just been more and more like that ever since I had that spiritual experience in India. I went back to India a couple of months later, And Orion and I both went directly to Oneness University to experience Mother's amazing connections to the divine. We did this chanting for 53 minutes nonstop. Existence, consciousness, bliss. I'm existence, consciousness, bliss. Over and over and over again, like 53 minutes nonstop.

That's intense. Or 49 minutes, I forget the magical number it was, but surprisingly, both of us had profound experiences from that. Like, Orion had an out-of-body experience from that. It just sounds so simple, but maybe it was the energy of being in this temple and with the monks there and everything. Boy, it was amazing. So yeah, I just kind of get in the zone or get into the vortex, to use Abraham Hicks terminology. Yeah, that's another, really. There are so many amazing people. Yeah. And Amma, the hugging saint. I got my mantra from Amma. I'm kind of a junkie and a spiritual.

I can see that . it's, it's fascinating. Cause, uh, you know, I did not know that about you and it just brings a warm smile to my face to have, to see the impact that all these experiences have had in your life and will now color how you live the rest of your life.

Yeah, yeah. And I have a big mission now that's not just about me. It's about, I mean, a lot of it needs to be about me in terms of, like, the buck stops with you. Like if you're trying to change the world and you don't change yourself, you miss the point, right? But then, it's not about me from an ego standpoint. And I want to make a huge impact on the world. And so my next year's goal is to be on Good Morning America or the Today Show with the New York Times bestselling book called Get Yourself Optimized. So that's what I'm working on. And it's so that I can change millions of lives and not just, you know, the number of listeners I have on my show, but to have mass like an on-mass sort of impact. Yeah.

Apparently, you're pretty good at manifesting your intentions.

Well, I'm working on it, and it's not just effort. I mean, it's effort plus grace.

Yes.

So, I recently went through a training on how to get on TV. So, I'm definitely learning the skills I've gotten on TV seven times in the last four months. So it's, you know, you just work your way up. It's a science. It's something that you can kind of reverse engineer. And then, yeah, I think it's very doable to get on Good Morning America, The Today Show.

I'm sure we'll be referring back to this episode when you pull it off. He did say on that episode of Podcast Junkies that he was gonna do that, and he did it in probably less time than you probably think is gonna happen. But I think it just speaks to the power of being very clear about what you want in your life. And I think too many people have this vague goal of I wanna be successful or I wanna be on TV. 

Behind that, there has to be an intention of why. In your case, it seems like you wanna do it because of the experiences you have and have had, and you wanna bring more love, more awareness, and more presence into the world. And that's a really positive intention that I think the universe will have to stand up for, take notice of, and respond to accordingly.

That sounds great.

In terms of, you know, in addition to what, you know, what you're planning with the book and being a good morning America, as you think about the scope of your life and how it's dramatically changed, you know, people, like to use the word legacy, is what else is on the roadmap for, for Stephan in terms of like what's left for you to do or where is there left for you to go that you haven't been yet?

Well, I guess making amends to all the people that I've hurt through my lifetime. Right. So, yeah, that's something that never really occurred to me until recently. From just the Kabbalah classes, I've hurt people along the way. I just said unkind things or treated people in a way that was not caring or compassionate. I need to make amends or at least acknowledge that with that person.

Right, so we all hurt people. We all do things and say things that are unkind or selfish or whatever.

So, I read recently that people have a fear of death because of unfinished business. Right, so you won't have fear of death if you don't have massive amounts of unfinished business. A lot of the unfinished business is because we lie. We say hurtful things. We do hurtful things. And we don't make good or kind of just acknowledge that with the person, right? So, or we just don't, we're too afraid to show up powerfully in the world because it's too risky, I guess, or whatever the reason, right?

So. Vulnerable.

Yeah. So I'm being vulnerable here, and if you would ask me for an interview at the beginning of, you know, when I started podcasting, actually, I started podcasting in 2007. And I gave it up for many years. I did it for less than a year, and I think I'm too early. Not really a good use of my time. If you had this interview with me, let's say, eight months ago, it probably would have been a pretty different interview. I mean, I still would have had a lot of spiritual experiences to share with you, but I've really come a long way, even in the last eight months. So, who knows what the next eight months will be.

We might have to have you back just to see, you know, you're capable of some pretty big transformations in a short period of time. So that's interesting. What do you think is the one most misunderstood thing about you?

Well, I get kind of put in a box like an SEO geek. And I'm so much more than that. And I think I'm starting to show that with the TV appearances and the podcast that's a self-help podcast and even just with my other podcast show marketing speak showing that my skills go way beyond SEO into conversion and you know analytics and Facebook and everything else so So yeah, I guess it's that putting me in a box sort of thing.

But I think that I also put other people in a box too. I think we all judge. And it just brings to the limelight for me that I'm judging a lot in my life. Because what we tend to focus on and feel the pain about the most are the things that we kind of dissociate about ourselves. So if somebody really hates being called a liar or whatever, they're probably being disingenuous in their lives or whatever, or you know, just something that like something bothers you about a person, like think about somebody that really bothers you. What is it about that person that really bothers you?

Are you asking me?

Sure.

Someone who's not sincere in their intentions.

Okay. So when have you not been sincere in your intentions?

I'm sure I can think of a couple of pretty recent experiences.

Right, so there are people that just get under my skin, and I had to think about what it is, why it is them and not somebody else and a different kind of behavior. What is it about those behaviors? Cause those behaviors get under my skin, but they don't get under Orion's skin. There are other things that get under Orion's skin that don't bother me at all. Like people like she just really dislikes and they don't, I just don't care about them. I just don't, I just, they don't bother me, right? So they just, it doesn't really affect me. It's the things that we most dissociate or dislike about ourselves that we're not owning kind of interesting.

Very interesting. What have you changed your mind about recently?

What have I changed my mind about? I don't know.

That seems like over the course of your life, there's been a lot of changes, I would think in the way you previously thought.

And, Oh yeah. But not like last week or today or whatever. I mean, like, if you look at how I viewed, um, like, uh, I don't know, giving back or. Yeah, like even a year ago, if you would ask me about giving back, I'd be like, oh yeah, I give back a lot, I donate all my time and do these wonderful things for Carter Center, blah, blah, blah. And what I wasn't being honest with myself about is, well, actually, I'm kind of stingy when it comes to money. So, I'm very giving when it comes to my time, but I'm not nearly as generous with my cash.

So then I start, and all growth happens outside your comfort zone, as they say, right? So I'm like stretching myself like, oh, this really hurts to give this $10 bill to this guy. Oh, or this really hurts right in this big check, or whatever. Like occasionally I do it, but it really hurts. So I'm doing more of it now, and it starts to hurt less, but it still hurts. But I know that I'm revealing light because I'm doing something that's outside my comfort zone.

That's where the growth happens.

Yeah, and one thing that you can test that's a Kabbalistic principle that is one of the very few things you can test and see that, yep, it actually works is if you give 10% of your income tithing, right? So you give it to organizations that will. Continue to spread the light, not like you give it to a homeless person who's gonna use it for themselves and themselves alone, but organizations that will continue to spread that energy. You will get more than that in return, right? So, not just intangibly, but tangibly, right?

So I wrote a big check out recently, and I got new clients, like a lot of new clients in a row, I don't like a lot, like three, which is a lot for me. Like these are consulting clients, and I got them in very short succession after I wrote a couple of reasonably big-sized checks, ones that made me kind of smart. Yeah, wince.

But that's, I mean, I'm a firm believer in that. For me, the explanation is like that you have to continuously give into the flow. And if you do anything to interrupt the flow, I mean, it's everything in the universe. Everything in nature works based on that principle. So the extent that you can become part of it, I think, you know, whatever you want more of in life, you have to give, you want more love, give more love, you know, to your example, you want more money, give more money. And without the intention of, like, where is it gonna come back? You know, just, you know, like as you touched upon earlier, I think unconditionally and unselfishly for it to have the best and most impactful effect.

So, hour plus, this is fun. I love that I had no idea where this was going, and I absolutely love where it ended up.

Yeah, me too.

And sometimes we just podcasting for me, as I've noticed in recent interviews, is like the small impetus for the conversation starter. But at the end of the day, every host has got a story.

And every time, and a lot of times, it doesn't have to do with podcasting. There's something deeper going on that is driving you. And then I couldn't have like demonstrated more clearly than in today's conversation with you.

Yeah. Spot on.

So I appreciate you, Stephan, taking the time to come on and, more importantly, like being open. It seems like this is the journey that you're on. I really appreciate the fact that you've been just willing to share everything that's been happening to you and demonstrate through your actions the impact that it's had in your life.

Well, I enjoyed having, uh, the opportunity to do it. And like I said, it's not always been easy, and it's getting easier, but I find that I get more blessings from the universe. The more I'm vulnerable, the more I'm out there just to. Proactively share so every opportunity is a gift.

Very cool. So, where's the best place for folks to track you down?

StephanSpencer.com so which has links to both of my podcast shows, Marketing Speak, which is at marketingspeak.com, and Get Yourself Optimized, which is an GetYourselfOptimized.com, but especially if they want information on SEO and online marketing, how to get to the top of Google how to get more leads and all that ton and just a ton of resources on that website. But if you're into the self-help stuff, then definitely check out Get Yourself Optimized.

And given that everyone knows that Orion is part of your life, maybe you should give her a quick plug on her podcast.

Oh, thank you. That's awesome, and she'll be very appreciative of that, too. Stellarlifepodcast.com, her main website is orionsmethod.com.

Very cool. Thanks again for your time, and I hope you have a fantastic day.

Thank you.

And you, as well. I think that you might've had an idea of what the show is going to be, what the episode was going to be like, what the interview was going to be like when I was talking about all of Stephan's accolades at the beginning, I sort of alluded to it that it was going to be different. And for me, the journey that he's been on was just really fascinating. And this interest he had in just completely transforming his life, which he did literally a total of 180.

And as I've gotten to know him over the past year and have now chatted with him a couple of times, and we've hung out a couple of times in person, I just like him more and more. And I just think he's a really genuine soul. And you know, that whole idea of the awakening that he had in India in 2012 is just like a pivotal moment for him. And it's set him on this completely different path. And I wonder how many people like that. How many of you guys have had something similar happen to you? I'd be interested in those stories. It feels like that's the theme for today, like transformation.

That's really what happened with Stephan. And it's been something that's been interesting to hear about. And I imagine if you spend a bit more time with him, just it would be interesting to ask him about it. So if you do, if you see him at a conference, you know, we're, we're fellow podcasters. So we all hang in the same circles but tell him you, you heard the episode here, and you were just fascinated by the story that he was telling.

So I think he'd really appreciate that. I mentioned last week that I've got a new project in the works and it's called a pod funnel. And it was really born out of this, you know, scratching my own itch thing where I know that there's all these different ways that we can share our episodes. And it's not necessarily that easy, and it takes time. And I've been. Let me know if this is something that relates to you or resonates with you.

I've been in my office, and my wife comes home, and I know that I'm not done with my podcasting tasks, and I feel like, oh, I just need one more hour, and then it bleeds into dinner, or it's the weekend, and it's like, oh, I just wanna wrap up a couple of intros or get this recorded or share it on a couple more sites and. You know, I thought, man, if I could do something that could make podcasters' lives just a little bit easier and save them, maybe if not days, then hours.

With their distribution plan, then I should do that because it's helping me, and I wanna share what I've learned with others. And so I started, you know, putting pieces together this, and I use it internally for some clients. And it's in the beginning stages. So, I don't have a landing page just for this conversation, but I thought you might wanna check it out. It's podfunnel.com, sign up. To request an invite, let me know if you'd be interested. I'm putting together some pioneers who are going to get lifetime access to it for a greatly reduced-price lifetime. Literally, you sign up and pay once, and that's it. 

You have it forever for the life of your podcast. So, if you're serious about podcasting and you're looking to make an investment in something that could potentially save you a bunch of headaches and maybe even put you in good standing with your spouse and save you some time to spend with your family because that's important, then check it out. We are a proud member, a proud member, a premier. If I could merge two words together, it would be a proud member and I would just say prember. I just made that up; Google it. I don't know if it's a thing. I am a proud member of Podcastica; check out the great shows there. Really happy with what's going on. We've got Game of Thrones and Walking Dead coming up in the fall. Oh no, game of, I think.

I'm confused now. Walking Dead is coming up, and then Game of Thrones; I think it's 2017. Anyway, if you need to get your amazing TV show fixed, then check out those shows and a couple of others that we've got in the mix there. Thanks again to Cedar and Soil. Check out cedarsoil.com for some fantastic music that he's producing. He did the intro and outro for me two and a half years ago, and I think he's surprised that I would be podcasting this long and talking about it and talking about him, but he's just a great guy. His name is George Abiana, and he is a fantastic musician, by the way. So check out his music. And the retention hashtag is, uh, hold on one second. I want to tell you about how you can engage with the show. See, you see what I did there.

That's like an open loop, like a cliffhanger sort of thing. Last week, I asked people to check out the show or connect with the show via the speak pipe. If you go on the site, um, it says, By now, it should say something different before it says to send a voicemail. So I think the cool thing that it should say and probably says now is to send me a voicemail. No, that doesn't make any sense. Like shout out, give me a shout-out.

That sounds like a good one. So anyway, check it out. It's the banner on the right-hand side of the page. Send a voicemail, send me a shout-out, or whatever it says. I'm gonna continue that this week. I wanna hear your voices. I wanna hear what you're thinking.

What do you feel if you're digging the episodes? If you like this specific episode, let me know. If you don't know who I am and you just want to say who you are and why you are asking me to call you, then do that as well. I want to start playing some of these on the air, and I'd love to hear your feedback.

That would be a fantastic thing. That's it, just one call to action this week and thanks for sticking out. Sticking along, sticking this far, the retention hashtag, retention hashtag. Man, I need to drink more water. Search Stephan because he's an SEO genius. So #searchStephan, one word, tag, and then tag him. His Twitter account is Sspenser, and mine is podcast underscore junkies, but you kinda knew that already, so go do the social thing and tell all the people in the world you can about podcast junkies.

Next week, we've got more interesting people to speak to. And I need to look up who's gonna be; I've got the schedule laid out, so you're gonna have to actually sit with me as I click through this list because I wanna make sure I'm talking about the right person. Yes, I thought it was. I knew it was. I mean, I didn't know, but I thought it was. It was Ellery Wells. Ellery's amazing; we connected at the podcast movement.

Again, someone I've known for like three years, and I'm like, man, we gotta talk, and he did not disappoint. Another great conversation. Ellery, Ellery, Ellery Wells. Geez. That's a mouthful. And the conversation is mouthful as well. See, I mix that in there. Okay. Enough of me rambling. Thank you. Love you guys. Have a fantastic week, and tell folks about the show. And remember, speak pipe, speak pipe to me. Let me know. I want to hear your voice. Have a great day. Bye!